A trip to Brooklyn

I flew in to Brooklyn to visit a friend I've had differences with and haven't spoken to in months. Our mutual friend Liz, as well as two other girls we went to high school with, also lived there. It was a very nice apartment and had a beautiful view of the Manhattan skyline. It was nighttime but all the buildings' lights were out. The frenemy said it had looked the same way during 9/11, so we were worried there had been another terrorist attack.

Their sink was absolutely full of dishes, and the frenemy wanted me to help her wash them. I hate washing dishes more than absolutely anything else in the world, but I did it anyway. I was frustrated with myself for always doing what she wanted me to. I thought it was weird that I had come all the way to Brooklyn to visit her when we hadn't talked for so long and I still harbored a lot of resentment toward her. I was about to confront her about the things that made me upset with her when she told me it was time to visit Neil, who also lived in Brooklyn.

By this time it was fully dark and I was very nervous about walking by myself in a city I wasn't familiar with, but the ladies there refused to come with me. I tried to call Neil on my cell phone to get directions, but it was malfunctioning and kept scrolling through all the pictures and videos I had taken on it.

I ducked into a gas station to ask for directions. At this point my perspective changed to being omniscient and it became daytime. The man at the cash register, who was the spitting image of Jay-Z, was whistling a song when a machine gun started shooting outside. A man who was the spitting image of John Leguizamo stumbled in, shot in multiple places. Jay-Z caught him before he hit the floor and was murmuring encouraging words to him. The machine gun guy came in too, intending to steal all the money in the cash register. Apparently Jay-Z had saved this guy's life in the past, so they all muddled the irony that his life was saved only so he could take the life of one of his friends. "He was my bro, man!" Jay-Z wailed.

Other tidbits: Michelle Lee and Barbara Reyelts, TV news anchors here, cowering in the face of HD TV and wrinkled as prunes. The apartment of a friend that was decorated like an Indian palace and that had the most comfortable bed in the world.